The Last Taxi Ride

by Kent Nerburn

Twenty years ago, I drove a cab for a living. One time I arrived in the middle of the night for a pick up at a building that was dark except for a single light in a ground floor window.

Under these circumstances, many drivers would just honk once or twice, wait a minute, then drive away. But I had seen too many impoverished people who depended on taxis as their only means of transportation. Unless a situation smelled of danger, I always went to the door. This passenger might be someone who needs my assistance, I reasoned to myself. So I walked to the door and knocked.

"Just a minute," answered a frail, elderly voice.

I could hear something being dragged across the floor. After a long pause, the door opened. A small woman in her 80's stood before me. She was wearing a print dress and a pillbox hat with a veil pinned on it, like somebody out of a 1940s movie. By her side was a small nylon suitcase.

The apartment looked as if no one had lived in it for years. All the furniture was covered with sheets. There were no clocks on the walls, no knickknacks or utensils on the counters. In the corner was a cardboard box filled with photos and glassware.

"Would you carry my bag out to the car?" she said. I took the suitcase to the cab, then returned to assist the woman. She took my arm and we walked slowly toward the curb. She kept thanking me for my kindness.

"It's nothing," I told her. "I just try to treat my passengers the way I would want my mother treated."

"Oh, you're such a good boy," she said. When we got in the cab, she gave me an address, then asked, "Could you drive through downtown?"

"It's not the shortest way," I answered quickly.

"Oh, I don't mind," she said. "I'm in no hurry. I'm on my way to a hospice."

I looked in the rear view mirror. Her eyes were glistening.

"I don't have any family left," she continued. "The doctor says I don't have very long."

I quietly reached over and shut off the meter. "What route would you like me to take?" I asked.

For the next two hours, we drove through the city. She showed me the building where she had once worked as an elevator operator. We drove through the neighborhood where she and her husband had lived when they were newlyweds. She had me pull up in front of a furniture warehouse that had once been a ballroom where she had gone dancing as a girl.

Sometimes she'd ask me to slow in front of a particular building or corner and would sit staring into the darkness, saying nothing.

As the first hint of sun was creasing the horizon, she suddenly said, "I'm tired. Let's go now."

We drove in silence to the address she had given me.

It was a low building, like a small convalescent home, with a driveway that passed under a portico. Two orderlies came out to the cab as soon as we pulled up. They were solicitous and intent, watching her every move. They must have been expecting her. I opened the trunk and took the small suitcase to the door. The woman was already seated in a wheelchair.

"How much do I owe you?" she asked, reaching into her purse.

"Nothing," I said.

"You have to make a living," she answered.

"There are other passengers."

Almost without thinking, I bent and gave her a hug. She held onto me tightly.

"You gave an old woman a little moment of joy," she said. "Thank you."

I squeezed her hand, then walked into the dim morning light. Behind me, a door shut. It was the sound of the closing of a life.

I didn't pick up any more passengers that shift. I drove aimlessly, lost in thought. For the rest of that day, I could hardly talk. What if that woman had gotten an angry driver, or one who was impatient to end his shift? What if I had refused to take the run, or had honked once, then driven away?

On a quick review, I don't think that I have done anything more important in my life. We're conditioned to think that our lives revolve around great moments. But great moments often catch us unaware – beautifully wrapped in what others may consider a small one.

Love is Not Enough →

Mark Manson:

You can fall in love with a wide variety of people throughout the course of your life. You can fall in love with people who are good for you and people who are bad for you. You can fall in love in healthy ways and unhealthy ways. You can fall in love when you’re young and when you’re old. Love is not unique. Love is not special. Love is not scarce.

But your self-respect is. So is your dignity. So is your ability to trust. There can potentially be many loves throughout your life, but once you lose your self-respect, your dignity or your ability to trust, they are very hard to get back.

"I no longer have patience."

I no longer have patience for certain things, not because I’ve become arrogant, but simply because I reached a point in my life where I do not want to waste more time with what displeases me or hurts me.

I have no patience for cynicism, excessive criticism and demands of any nature. I lost the will to please those who do not like me, to love those who do not love me and to smile at those who do not want to smile at me. I no longer spend a single minute on those who lie or want to manipulate.

I decided not to coexist anymore with pretense, hypocrisy, dishonesty and cheap praise. I do not tolerate selective erudition nor academic arrogance. I do not adjust either to popular gossiping.

I hate conflict and comparisons. I believe in a world of opposites and that’s why I avoid people with rigid and inflexible personalities. In friendship I dislike the lack of loyalty and betrayal. I do not get along with those who do not know how to give a compliment or a word of encouragement. Exaggerations bore me and I have difficulty accepting those who do not like animals. And on top of everything I have no patience for anyone who does not deserve my patience.

A Reason, A Season, A Lifetime

People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.

When you figure out which one it is,

you will know what to do for each person.

When someone is in your life for a reason,

it is usually to meet a need you have expressed.

They have come to assist you through a difficulty;

to provide you with guidance and support;

to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually.

They may seem like a godsend, and they are.

They are there for the reason you need them to be.

Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time,

this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end.

Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away.

Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand.

What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled; their work is done.

The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.

Some people come into your life for a season,

because your turn has come to share, grow or learn.

They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh.

They may teach you something you have never done.

They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy.

Believe it. It is real. But only for a season.

Lifetime relationships teach you lifetime lessons;

things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation.

Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person,

and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life.

It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.

30 Things to Stop Doing to Yourself

by Unknown

As Maria Robinson once said, "nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending." nothing could be closer to the truth. but before you can begin this process of transformation you have to stop doing the things that have been holding you back. here are some ideas to get you started:

  • Stop spending time with the wrong people.: life is too short to spend time with people who suck the happiness out of you. if someone wants you in their life, they'll make room for you. you shouldn't have to fight for a spot. never, ever insist yourself to someone who continuously overlooks your worth. and remember, it's not the people that stand by your side when you're at your best, but the ones who stand beside you when you're at your worst that are your true friends.

  • Stop running from your problems.: face them head on. no, it won't be easy. there is no person in the world capable of flawlessly handling every punch thrown at them. we aren't supposed to be able to instantly solve problems. that's not how we're made. in fact, we're made to get upset, sad, hurt, stumble and fall. because that's the whole purpose of living: to face problems, learn, adapt, and solve them over the course of time. this is what ultimately molds us into the person we become.

  • Stop lying to yourself.: you can lie to anyone else in the world, but you can't lie to yourself. our lives improve only when we take chances, and the first and most difficult chance we can take is to be honest with ourselves.

  • Stop putting your own needs on the back burner.: the most painful thing is losing yourself in the process of loving someone too much, and forgetting that you are special too. yes, help others; but help yourself too. if there was ever a moment to follow your passion and do something that matters to you, that moment is now.

  • Stop trying to be someone you're not.: one of the greatest challenges in life is being yourself in a world that's trying to make you like everyone else. someone will always be prettier, someone will always be smarter, someone will always be younger, but they will never be you. don't change so people will like you. be yourself and the right people will love the real you.

  • Stop trying to hold onto the past.: you can't start the next chapter of your life if you keep re-reading your last one.

  • Stop being scared to make a mistake.: doing something and getting it wrong is at least ten times more productive than doing nothing. every success has a trail of failures behind it, and every failure is leading towards success. you end up regretting the things you did NOT do far more than the things you did.

  • Stop berating yourself for old mistakes.: we may love the wrong person and cry about the wrong things, but no matter how things go wrong, one thing is for sure, mistakes help us find the person and things that are right for us. we all make mistakes, have struggles, and even regret things in our past. but you are not your mistakes, you are not your struggles, and you are here NOW with the power to shape your day and your future. every single thing that has ever happened in your life is preparing you for a moment that is yet to come.

  • Stop trying to buy happiness.: many of the things we desire are expensive. but the truth is, the things that really satisfy us are totally free: love, laughter and working on our passions.

  • Stop exclusively looking to others for happiness.: if you're not happy with who you are on the inside, you won't be happy in a long-term relationship with anyone else either. you have to create stability in your own life first before you can share it with someone else.

  • Stop being idle.: don't think too much or you'll create a problem that wasn't even there in the first place. evaluate situations and take decisive action. you cannot change what you refuse to confront. making progress involves risk. period! you can't make it to second base with your foot on first.

  • Stop thinking you're not ready.: nobody ever feels 100% ready when an opportunity arises. because most great opportunities in life force us to grow beyond our comfort zones, which means we won't feel totally comfortable at first.

  • Stop getting involved in relationships for the wrong reasons.: relationships must be chosen wisely. it's better to be alone than to be in bad company. there's no need to rush. if something is meant to be, it will happen: in the right time, with the right person, and for the best reason. fall in love when you're ready, not when you're lonely.

  • Stop rejecting new relationships just because old ones didn't work.: in life you'll realize that there is a purpose for everyone you meet. some will test you, some will use you and some will teach you. but most importantly, some will bring out the best in you.

  • Stop trying to compete against everyone else.: don't worry about what others doing better than you. concentrate on beating your own records every day. success is a battle between YOU and YOURSELF only.

  • Stop being jealous of others.: jealousy is the art of counting someone else's blessings instead of your own. ask yourself this: "what's something i have that everyone wants?"

  • Stop complaining and feeling sorry for yourself.: life's curveballs are thrown for a reason: to shift your path in a direction that is meant for you. you may not see or understand everything the moment it happens, and it may be tough. but reflect back on those negative curveballs thrown at you in the past. you'll often see that eventually they led you to a better place, person, state of mind, or situation. so smile! let everyone know that today you are a lot stronger than you were yesterday, and you will be.

  • Stop holding grudges.: don't live your life with hate in your heart. you will end up hurting yourself more than the people you hate. forgiveness is not saying, "what you did to me is okay." it is saying, "i'm not going to let what you did to me ruin my happiness forever." forgiveness is the answer"¦ let go, find peace, liberate yourself! and remember, forgiveness is not just for other people, it's for you too. if you must, forgive yourself, move on and try to do better next time.

  • Stop letting others bring you down to their level.: refuse to lower your standards to accommodate those who refuse to raise theirs.

  • Stop wasting time explaining yourself to others.: your friends don't need it and your enemies won't believe it anyway. just do what you know in your heart is right.

  • Stop doing the same things over and over without taking a break.: the time to take a deep breath is when you don't have time for it. if you keep doing what you're doing, you'll keep getting what you're getting. sometimes you need to distance yourself to see things clearly.

  • Stop overlooking the beauty of small moments.: enjoy the little things, because one day you may look back and discover they were the big things. the best portion of your life will be the small, nameless moments you spend smiling with someone who matters to you.

  • Stop trying to make things perfect.: the real world doesn't reward perfectionists, it rewards people who get things done.

  • Stop following the path of least resistance.: life is not easy, especially when you plan on achieving something worthwhile. don't take the easy way out. do something extraordinary.

  • Stop acting like everything is fine if it isn't.: it's okay to fall apart for a little while. you don't always have to pretend to be strong, and there is no need to constantly prove that everything is going well. you shouldn't be concerned with what other people are thinking either: cry if you need to: it's healthy to shed your tears. the sooner you do, the sooner you will be able to smile again.

  • Stop blaming others for your troubles.: the extent to which you can achieve your dreams depends on the extent to which you take responsibility for your life. when you blame others for what you're going through, you deny responsibility: you give others power over that part of your life.

  • Stop trying to be everything to everyone.: doing so is impossible, and trying will only burn you out. but making one person smile CAN change the world. maybe not the whole world, but their world. so narrow your focus.

  • Stop worrying so much.: worry will not strip tomorrow of its burdens, it will strip today of its joy. one way to check if something is worth mulling over is to ask yourself this question: "will this matter in one year's time? three years? five years?" if not, then it's not worth worrying about.

  • Stop focusing on what you don't want to happen.: focus on what you do want to happen. positive thinking is at the forefront of every great success story. if you awake every morning with the thought that something wonderful will happen in your life today, and you pay close attention, you'll often find that you're right.

  • Stop being ungrateful.: no matter how good or bad you have it, wake up each day thankful for your life. someone somewhere else is desperately fighting for theirs. instead of thinking about what you're missing, try thinking about what you have that everyone else is missing.

Re: I think everyone goes through stages of friends

keshialee:

I think depending on what you're doing, and what you're going through throughout your life, you have sets of friends.

You have friends for this particular sport you do, because of a hobby you have whether it be music, dance, or anything like that. And your friends are really different, all of them. and you go through a stage when all you do is be with them everyday, then all of a sudden you find yourself hanging around another set of friends.

but that doesn't mean you've forgotten anything that you've been through with them. After being with someone or a group of people everyday you pretty much know their insides and outs. Just because you stop hanging out with someone for a while doesn't mean you don't want to be around them, it just means life is throwing you in a different direction, and the next stage in life.

We learn the most by growing from others. The people we surround ourselves with will make a huge impact on our lives.

I miss so many people, it's inevitable to say “i miss you.” i've met some of the most amazing people in my life.

and people have been in and out, but that doesn't mean they're out forever. it means they're out living their lives and living their dreams. everyone goes through stages of friends, but throughout those stages, i'll keep and remember all of the friendships and memories i've made throughout my lifetime.

THIS.

I've been thinking about this a lot lately, especially of everyone I've met since Summer 2008.

I miss those endless hours on BlogTV. I miss those all-night Skype calls and Tokbox slumber parties. I miss seeing the same friendly faces at JAG every week. I miss driving to NorCal or San Diego on back-to-back-to-back weekends. I miss having a FB invite every week to a show that EVERYONE will be at. I miss flying all over the place so I could spend time with friends and meet more amazing people.

But I'm forcing myself to keep a low-profile. I have to do what's best for me, and at the moment, that means focusing on getting my career back on track.

I know that life is pulling you all into different directions too, whether it's for school, work, music or your relationship with your significant other. Whatever it is you're focusing on, I fully support you doing whatever is best for you.

I miss you all dearly. And even though we don't hang out as much as we used to, I know the next time we do, it'll be like we never skipped a beat.

Love you all. Always. <3

-Mel

"The Gods envy us."

I'll tell you a secret. Something they don't teach you in your temple. The Gods envy us. They envy us because we're mortal, because any moment might be our last. Everything is more beautiful because we're doomed. You will never be lovelier than you are now. We will never be here again.

—Achilles, played by Brad Pitt in the movie, "Troy"

I love love love this scene. Not because of the religious stuff or cuz Brad Pitt gets half-naked...but cuz it reinforces the idea of cherishing what you have like there is no tomorrow.

Like the final months of each major chapter in my life:

  • My final year of middle school before going off to boarding school.

  • My senior year of boarding school

  • My last summer vacation in Saudi Arabia before moving to the states permanently.

  • My final year of college.

I remember those times better than any other. I knew those moments would be my last, so I really savored every bit of it.

Unfortunately for most of those years in between, I somewhat took for granted. I kinda lived through those years by just going through the motions of things. It's just too easy to fall into that kinda trap when you have that overoptimistic mentality of "forever."

But when you realize that all things in your life could be pulled from right under you at any moment...you learn to truly appreciate everything.