If you send me a text and I text you back immediately, chances are either:

A) I like you
B) I'm pooing

I'm here at work and can't stop spreading my legs or rubbing my thighs...

These Lululemon man pants are so comfortable I want to cry.

😭😭😭

Never thought I'd be dropping this much $$$ on all these bougie stretchy Lululemon pants and Diesel JoggJeans…but dammit, I EARNED THIS SHIT. 💪🏼

Last year I wrote:

My mantra for 2015 was, "Little acts of courage." Thanks to my therapist and everyone he introduced me to, all of the crap that was weighing on my mind in 2014 slowly eased away. I can't quite say that 2015 was a good year for me, but I can say that it was definitely a better one.

For 2016, my mantra was, "Fail more." It was the next step above "little acts of courage" in that it expects that I constantly push my own boundaries and constantly fail. But instead of getting discouraged, I should feel proud for the opportunity to learn something new about myself. And every once in a while, when I expect to fail…the universe occasionally surprises me in wondrous ways.

For the fourteenth straight year, here is my annual survey of how I spent my year 2016.

Last year I wrote:

2014 was a pretty miserable year for me. I'm sure one would ever expect it. What people tend to forget is social media is just a giant online highlight reel. There’s a whole 'lotta life that happens in between posts, and for me, it was pretty shitty.

My mantra for 2015 was, "Little acts of courage." Thanks to my therapist and everyone he introduced me to, all of the crap that was weighing on my mind in 2014 slowly eased away. I can't quite say that 2015 was a good year for me, but I can say that it was definitely a better one.

For the thirteenth straight year, without fail, here is my annual survey of how I spent my year 2015.

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Essena O'Neill:

I had everything I ever wanted. Now I'm here and I see how contrived, fake and forced consistently proving to the world 'how amazing my life/body/self is".

I spent everyday looking at a screen, viewing and comparing myself to others. It's easier to look at shiny and pretty things that appear happy than stopping and just getting real with yourself. Social media only became great for me because of the amount of effort I put in trying to portray this 'perfect' person, being born into the flesh I have and sharing emotional parts of my life. Being social media famous is a very unattainable thing for majority of people viewing this. I was attracted to the idea of being liked and of value. I put my value in numbers, not real life people, moments or my natural passions of art, writing... Posting on instagram consumed me.

I can't [tell you enough] you how beautiful life is without a phone, without social media, without comparing, or likes or followers. We are not followers, we are beings of individuality and love. I have never felt so free.

This is the EXACT reason why I cut back on social media.

For me, social media was my creative outlet. It was simply a fun way to share how I see the world with my friends.

But somehow during that process, it became less about creative expression and more about getting validation from others. It got to a point where my day was made if I got a lot of Likes, or my day would've taken a hit because I didn't get enough. I was already in a rut, and I'd constantly find myself comparing my behind-the-scenes life with the highlights of everyone else's.

I realized how much of a negative impact social media was having on other aspects of my life.

Looking at the big picture, it scares me to think the next generation of kids is going to grow up believing their value in life is determined by superficial numbers of followers and likes. I'm not sure how this problem will be solved, but it's good to see a big social media personality address the issue.

I'd rather be hurt with the truth than comforted with a lie.

Four years ago, I was picking up pieces of myself off the ground. Three years after that, I focused on rebooting my career. This past year, I focused on my new puppy and myself.

2014 was a pretty miserable year for me. I'm sure one would ever expect it. What people tend to forget is social media is just a giant online highlight reel. There’s a whole 'lotta life that happens in between posts, and for me, it was pretty shitty.

For the twelfth straight year, without fail, here is my annual survey of how I spent my year 2014.

Back in the day, I used to be super private about my personal life. No matter how hurt or how angry I was, I kept it all inside. I felt like it was the honorable thing to do.

But then I realized how much that shit would just eat me from the inside. That little fire in me would grow bigger and bigger...to the point where it'd just take one wrong push of a button and I would unleash everything on one unlucky person.

I couldn't take it anymore.

So I started to open up. A lot more. I'd blast all my business on my blog. Passive aggressive posts, left and right. Some posts even calling people out, straight up. It didn't matter how outrageous or irrational I was feeling; I was hurt, I was angry, and I wanted to let the whole fucking world know it. So I did.

But then I realized that venting publicly never solved anything. Nobody gives a shit. Nobody cares for a pity party. It only caused more drama for others and it'd always eventually come back to me.

So then I started to confide in my close friends. I'd tell them everything. I trusted them, wholeheartedly. They were my closest friends and they were always looking out for me.

But then I realized how much friends gossip. Even the close ones. I learned that telling them, "please don't tell anyone" apparently means, "okay, tell your close friends everything that I'm about to tell you, but tell them not to tell anyone."

I learned how fast and how dangerous the gossip train can get. In my most vulnerable times, when all I was doing was clawing and reaching for guidance and stability, I inadvertently became the source of gossip and ended up hurting people I still cared about. (You know who you are, and I'm so fucking sorry I hurt you.)

So now everything has come full circle. I've learned that I can't trust people. I've learned that I can't just scream at the world and blast shit on the internet. I've learned that if I'm going down, I can't just take other people down with me. I've learned to keep my private life private.

I let shit eat me on the inside. I fight my own battles now. I struggle with my own demons. Constantly. Because at the end of the day, it's the honorable thing to do, and the only person that will ever truly be around for me is...me.