How I Spent My Year 2013

Ten years. That's how long I've been doing this annual survey thing. Ten f'ing years. I don't write much original content on this blog but if there's one blog post I can count on making each year, it's this one.

I am going do this annual blog post every year for the rest of my life.

I try really hard to give answers that'll still mean something over time. Maybe one day, a loved one or a child of mine will find a lot of value in all this, maybe even years after I've passed.

Or if nobody ever reads this, that'd be fine too. I've been keeping up with this tradition because I love taking the time to reflect on how I've grown.

In 2011, my life was in shambles. In 2012, my focus was getting my career back on track. In 2013, things finally started falling into place. It feels good.

Here's how my year 2013 went.

Read More

A Letter to Myself from Mel '08

This is a little tradition I started four years ago. The idea is to email myself using, and have that email sent to me in exactly two years.

Sure, I could easily just write in my journal or blog...but writing an email to myself seems a little more intimate and lets me paint a more descriptive snapshot of what's going on in my life at that very moment.

Here is the last thing I wrote to myself, a little over two years ago (with a few things censored out). Mind you, this is just a few short weeks before I found myself in the newest chapter of my life -- btvfam.

Friday, August 1, 2008:

Hey Future Mel, how's life treatin' ya??

Life is pretty good for me right now. Work is cool...a little stressful cuz of the growing pains, but it's a fun learning experience. [The company] is now 28ish employees with the newest hire being Erin. [...] I still feel like I haven't quite made my mark. I'll be patient though...I believe in [our new CEO].

I spent a big chunk of the morning talking to my co-workers about VIKING QUEST ( Ryan is all, "dude, you wouldn't even have to pack. Just bring a toothbrush and be naked for one whole week." Hahahahahahh.

So Mel, are you still running? I weigh 238ish nowadays, which is 10lbs less since I started little Nike+ SportBand thing. [...] I'm running half as much as I did before the Oregon Reunion, but my progress has been awesome. [...]

So this weekend was a really awesome one. I drove down to SD to kick it with Meliss...and it was such a blast. [...] I think my favorite part of the weekend was chillin' at La Jolla Cove with Meliss, overlooking the ocean. It was so chill and so peaceful. It's one of those moments where you can put life on pause and just appreciate the stillness. It felt like home.

So what's the deal with you and [that one business idea]? Right now the lawyers are doing the paperwork for forming the company. I feel like anything can happen. It might be huge; might be a flop; it might be modest like [my old site that had 12,000+ members]. But regardless, it should be a fun learning experience.

So anyways, how's your love life now? You still crushing on [some cute girl]? You still spend your lunch breaks chatting with Tracie? Late nights with Meliss? You talk to April at all anymore? Have you found it in your heart to completely let go of the whole [backstabbing friend] & [heartbreaker girl] thing? I'm just about over it but there's still a bit of anger there.

Anyways, hope all is well with you. Don't forget to write Mel 2012!!!

Much love,

Mel '08

It's crazy reading this cuz the first Time Capsule email I wrote in 2006, it was just a couple months after graduation and a little before I got my first real job. My future was just up in the air at that point.

Fast forward to now, where I just recently had to quit that very job. Once again, I find my future is up in the air.

I'm definitely gonna keep this tradition alive and write to my 2012 future me. There are a ton of possibilities/questions/worries for me right now and I'm just eager to see how it will all unfold.

We'll see how things are in two years. In the, laugh and learn.

Convo: Optimism

Harv: got on the elevator with jessica biel
Mel: hhahh niice
Harv: the camera totally adds pounds.. she looked way skinner in real life
Mel: whoa no way
Mel: she have man shoulders?
Harv: nah.. she looked fine
Harv: prettier in person actually
Harv: i'm not a big fan
Harv: i asked for her number.. she just ignored me
Mel: well hey, she didn't say "no"
Harv: LOL
Harv: she rolled her eyes and made a look of disgust.. but.. you're right.. she didn't say "no"

Convo: How to Turn Off Jayce

shindarbarthia: how do i turn off this thing!
majlkman: you don't
majlkman: bwahahahhaa
meltajon: slash slash off, allie
majlkman: stfu mel
ty91011: //off
majlkman: alt+ctrl+del allie
majlkman: alt+f4 5 times really fast
meltajon: ALT + F4
fragsworth: ya alt f4
fragsworth: i just did it
fragsworth: it wokred
jaycetan: ahhahahahahha
majlkman: thast why you're still typing in here right?
ty91011: how do you turn off jayce
meltajon: you show him a girl
majlkman: LOL
majlkman: hahahhahaha
jdoll122807: LOLZ

Two Years at the Office

October 23rd officially marked my second year of working. So much has changed in this year, it's ridiculous. We got a new CEO and over the past several months, he's been going department-by-department restructuring the company. I've seen my role changed considerably over the past few month too. Instead of doing bitch work, I'm being put in a position where I can really utilize my knowledge and experience.

I said last year that I love my job, and one year later I'm happy to say that still holds true. A big reason why is because of stupid shit like this:

Everyone subconsciously whistling Wesley's ringtone, the Super Mario theme, Rick Roll, Tetris theme and the A-Team theme.

Interviewee with a really bad lazy eye:

Harv: he did an excellent job of maintaining eye-contact...with the both of the same time...

Cool idea for adding to the chat feature:

Wolfey: I should just throw in "WOLFEY RULEZ" into every other message

Meaning to say "drag and drop"?

Harv: Drug and Drop!

Wolfey picking on the mini-mart asian lady:

Wolfey: I think Asian lady has this OCD thing where she has to straighten out every dollar bill
Wolfey: I'm gonna fold every corner of every bill that I give her from now on to test her

Diego's optimistic Facebook status after getting fired:


Diego's Facebook status on his new engagement:


Diego's optimistic Facebook status on the called off engagement:


Adam on how to deal with a shitty applicant:

Harv: i'm gonna shred his resume
Adam: nah, don't even shred it.
Adam: don't waste the power.

Andrew on quality control:

Andrew: how do I hide all these freakin' errors??
Adam: WTF
Adam: you're supposed to fix the fucking errors, not hide them!!

Nerds fighting over stuff:

Adam: I wanna go to the MySQL Conference
Thomas: I wanna go to the MySQL Conference!
Harv: like a spoiled kid
Harv: but I wanna go to the MySQL Conference!!

Adam asking Shezaan what he missed out on after someone's birthday:

Adam: oh, there was a birthday?
Adam: what did I miss?
Shezaan: not much
Shezaan: just the usual
Shezaan: cutting the cake and Mel eating it all.

Majid asking Adam to explain something during a demo:

Majid: Adam, how would you explain "API" in two words or less.

A client noticing an inappropriate test forum:

Client: teabagging forum???

Ray on explaining my new promotion:

Ray: Mel is somewhere in between a programmer and designer
Ray: he's somewhat of a hybrid
Ray: I like to think of him as a "morphidite"
Adam: Mel is a hermaphridite!!

Wolfey suggesting a new company chatroom for AIM:

Adam: please keep this chat reserved only for work related issues.
Adam: I've been receiving complaints from individuals that our side talk is spamming them and distracting them from work.
Ryan: gaaay
Wolfey: can we have [Office_Fun]
Wolfey: and rename this to [Office_Not_Fun]
Adam: asshole.

Convo: Brazilian BBQ for Men Only

Mel: I would never take a girl here...this is such a man's restaurant.
Rodrigo: Yeah, girls here would be such a waste.
Mel: They should make a brazilian bbq place but with a 300 theme.
Mel: The servers are all in Spartan uniforms and capes, and the serve the meat on Spartan spears...
Mel: That would be awesome!
Rodrigo: :uhh:
Rodrigo: Uhh, no. That would be really gay.
Mel: Shit, you're right. Nevermind.

Mexican Conspiracy

Ryan: so who were those zexy ladies you were giving the eye-fuck to today?
Mel: hahaa
Mel: you saw that?
Mel: when i was outside?
Mel: i dunno but they were hot
Ryan: im talking about the ones you were meeting with, dumb-dumb
Mel: ohh
Mel: for the spanish site we're working on
Mel: ** or something
Ryan: iiiiiiiiinteresting
Ryan: they didnt look mexican to me
Mel: the company is ruled by white people
Ryan: hhahaha
Ryan: niice
Ryan: first we take mexifornia from them.. now we're gonna run their spanish websites
Mel: hahah
Ryan: but they are working to subvert us
Ryan: by taking jobs in fast food and burrito joints
Ryan: and at a critical point they strike and say "give us what we want, or NO BURRITO FOR YOU!"
Ryan: anarchy will ensue
Mel:** hahahahahahaa

Keep it in the Family??

So I was having an interesting convo with an international friend whom I'll refer to as "Jorge"...

Jorge: yeah, I'd get drunk and dance all the time.
Jorge: this one girl I knew would make fun of me and call me a "ballerina"
Mel: :bakla:
Jorge: but that's okay cuz I eventually banged her.
Mel: :rofl:
Mel: the last time I did crazy drunken dancing was at my cousin's wedding
Mel: hell, that night I discovered I could breakdance
Mel: but anyways, it was kinda weird...I couldn't dance with any girls cuz all the girls were my freakin' cousins.
Jorge: what's wrong with that?
Mel: :uhh:
Jorge: back home we'd dance with our family all the time.
Jorge: we'd do that thing where you put your leg between hers and she'd do the same
Jorge: and you two do you say....rub?
Mel: you mean like grinding?
Jorge: yeah.
Mel: :uhh:
Mel: yeah, that's kinda frowned upon here in the states, dude.
Jorge: really?
Jorge: what about banging your cousins?
Mel: :omg:
Jorge: you can't bang your cousins??
Jorge: not even if they're hot?
Mel: dude, no!!
Mel: I mean, I'm proud to say that I have good looking cousins...but no...that's
Mel: cuz dude, the way I see it, it's like
Mel: mom...her sisters...their daughters...
Jorge: no no no, it's quite simple:
Jorge: there's your penis...and her vagina.
Mel: no no doesn't work that way...
Jorge: but it's the best!
Jorge: cuz it's like you two grow up together and you have a connection
Jorge: and then she's all pretty and you want to have sex
Jorge: she doesn't have to worry about getting hurt because you're family!
Mel: dude, you just said "sex" and "family" in the same sentence!

So yeah, his little persuasive speech didn't work on me.

Then strangely a couple days later, this article came out: Study: Most babies born to first-cousins are healthy.

But sorry, I'm still not convinced; my cousins are here strictly for potlucks, drinking and karaoke.

Fogo de Chao

At the office, we had a bet on whether or not we would finish four projects by the end of April.

We finished seven. So our CEO agreed to take us out to dinner, wherever we choose, and as a bonus he threw in a free limo ride.

When you win a bet like that, of course you want to eat at some place ridiculously expensive. And if you know me, all dinner celebrations absolutely must have big portions.

So my Brazilian co-worker, Rodrigo, comes up with the greatest suggestion ever: Brazilian BBQ. And if you don't know, that's the all-you-can-eat place where you stay seated at your table while waiters come around and slice off servings of meat straight off the spear.

God damn, that was such a fucking good idea! Lemme show you how that afternoon went:

The limo is here!

As you can see, I'm totally ecstatic:

Brazilian BBQ 101. Even thought the salad buffet is supposedly superb, you stay the fuck away from it! And for the dinner rolls, they serve these amazingly fluffy cheese bread. Taste a little but not too much!

Their grilled bananas feel good in your mouth too:

There's a two-sided card next to every plate. Red means stop. Green means go.

We like green.

One thing I need to note for any first-time Fogo de Chão goer: when your card is green, the waiters will absolutely bombard you with meat. I swear, they rush at you like a large group of zombies, but instead of eating you, they want to feed you. It's intimidating as hell.

In no particular order, here's a couple of my favorites:

  • Picanha — One of our most popular cuts, this prime part of the sirloin is served seasoned with sea salt or flavored with garlic.
  • Filet Mignon — This succulent piece of meat is cut from the tenderloin and seasoned to perfection. Also served wrapped in bacon.
  • Linguica — These robust pork sausages are seasoned and slow-roasted to mouthwaterinf perfection.

And then to top it off, I had the chocolate mousse cake (which was definitely the largest of all the desserts):

And then, sleepy time:

So how much was it? Well from what I've heard, it's about $35/person for lunch. For dinner, it's supposedly around $75/person. And that's not even including the wine and desserts. But I promise you, it is worth it once in your life.

biggrin: :biggrin: :biggrin: :biggrin: :biggrin:

View All Photos (84) | View Official Site

BBILF. Brazilian BBQ I'd like to fuck.

What if we were "deaf?"

Mel: do you think it'd be easier for us to get girls if we pretended to be deaf like ryan?
Mel: that'd be fucking sweet
Mel: we wouldn't have to talk
Mel: and
Mel: we wouldn't have to listen
Rodrigo: I don't know if would be easir in the overall... but would be easier to grab their asses wihth no apparent reason
Rodrigo: plus, imagine me, drunk, trying to playing the deaf guy
Mel: hahahahahaa
Rodrigo: that would NEVER work
Mel: hahahahaha
Mel: "baby, i have this condition where i spontaneously go's nothing personal....sometimes i just can't hear you"
Rodrigo: hahahahhahaha
Rodrigo: "and the cure is a blowjob"
Mel: "but i get ssleepy don't get mad if i fall's just another condition i have"