I loathe myself....

aight, so last night i've been having all kinds of crap since i tried to upgrade my computer. i promised myself that i wouldn't go to bed til i got everything up and running because the next day i have a paper to do. we finally get it done and i pass out around 5 in the morning.

for some reason in my sleep, i woke up around 8:44 because i had a feeling that i set my alarm clock to PM instead of AM again...low and behold i was right.

"fuck...i've got 15 minutes to get ready and get my ass in the far building!!"

so i throw on some clothes (kinda as fast as i could but i also wanted to put on something decent cuz of this one cutie i sit next to) and i run to the bathroom, brush my teeth while i'm firing my morning missle and take off to class.

i'm totally hauling ass cuz i have to turn in my part of the group assignment and the TA is super-anal about tardiness. the entire time i'm running i'm thinkin' to myself, "god damnit, i'm gonna be late...wtf its so late that there isn't even anyone else walking around....everyone else is already in their classes!! fuck oh fuck of fuck oh fuck. why the fuck did i wake up at 8:44...i have class at 10, damnit...wait...class at 10...wtf...ITS NOT EVEN 9:30..."

i loathe myself...

UPDATE: i found $30 on the street on the way to my class!!! :thefinger:


alan came over for the weekend. played a lot of bball thursday night then went straight to my crib in long beach. when i finished taking a shower i realized i forgot to bring extra pairs of boxers...so i went commando....for 3 days.

and now its late sunday and honestly...i kinda like freeballin. less laundry...no more need to buy boxers...its like a newfound freedom...i could get used to this...

Back to Dieting

damn, so the other day i weighed myself for the first time since before spring break...and i swear, the scale has to be off by 6 lbs. the scale now says i'm 231...which is by far the most i've ever weighed...looks like its time to go back on a diet.

i'm not gonna go on the Ziad Crash Diet and cut out all carbs from my life...fuck sake, i'm asian...i live on rice, damnit. instead i'm just gonna go back to the subway diet...this time around i'm gonna eat a 6 inch sweet onion chicken teriyaki for dinner and another 6 inch a couple hours later.

and when i do lose 45 lbs, i'm gonna go spandex crazy, baby!!! just kidding

I'm a changed man now

Friday, April 4, 2003

the past week i've learned a lot about myself. my econ professor, mr. martinez started off the quarter by telling us how he used to be a major fuckup in his college days. that was a shame because he was really smart in high school and junior high. his first year of college he had a 0.5 gpa, and he kept telling us all of his stories of him goin' to mexico and getting wasted throughout his first year of college. he was living off of his mom and seemed to be destined to fail. but then all of that changed for him.

his future wife tried real hard to help him get his shit together. she promised that she'd go to class with him and take notes for him. hell, she would go to class for him even when he wasn't there. that helped him change a bit...but it wasn't until the the day they had their first child that he realized he had to get his shit together.

it was at that point that his mom cut him off financially. "if you're man enough to have a child then you're man enough to make your own money." from there, he went back to school, graduated and even finished grad school. he did all this other shit because he had a family now. he told us of the old phrase, "behind every strong man is an even stronger woman."

that seemed rather mushy for me...but then he continued on saying a few years after his second child, his wife was killed in a car accident....at that point the entire classroom was dead silent. he then looked at the picture of his wife in his binder and said, "i was destined for failure but then she came along...i do everything for her now...she is my motivation...that's what all of you guys have to find...your motivation. i didn't think i had one but then i finally found it...and it was her...."

his story actually reminds me of me...i had a 0.25 gpa first quarter and i still lack the motivation to get straight A's and B's like i did back in saudi. i've gotta find that motivation again.

there's also been some other things that's happened this week...specifically, my april fools day prank on julie. well, it wasn't really the prank itself but rather the backlash afterwards. i find it real hard when my closest friends, even though they know it was all just a prank, start accusing me of being something that i'm not. that prank took a lot of it out of me and now all of a sudden, gay jokes don't seem so funny to me anymore.

because of all this, i'm making it official that i'm giving up on gay jokes. i'm also gonna cut back heavily on the perverted shit....its like i've been carrying the same immature 6th grade humor with me for the past 9 years. this probably explains why i have never been in a long term relationship...i could never joke around about anything other than perverted gay jokes.

but all of that's gonna change starting today. i'm 21 now. its time for me to start acting like it.

Gotta find a job now

aight, so i finally passed all my classes from last quarter. now my gpa has increased to an outstanding 2.0. :bigthumbup: i started the new quarter this week and i'm having the hardest time trying to get into my core classes. i only got into two....the third one i was gonna add was a night class, from 6-8pm, and with a really shitty teacher. as one kid commented, "take this guy only if you want a death wish...this is your man if you want to sit and rot in the worst hell for a class..."

need i say more?

aight, so i dropped that class faster than i drop a beat... :? anyways, i tried sitting in other classes so i could join but with no avail. so now i'm stuck with only two real classes and two PE classes, bball & volleyball. i looked at the classes they have at long beach state for summer and they don't really have any classes for me. so i called my dad and he's got that "i'm dissappointed" tone...which was really subtle but its the kind of thing that makes you feel like shit. to make him feel a bit better, i promised him that if i can't get into a class then i'll get a part-time job for now til the end of summer.

so now i have to find my ass a job....man, i miss the days of sleeping under my desk in the admin building.

Weekend in San Diego

Monday, March 24, 2003

the weekend of my birthday, alan came down and we went down to san diego to kick it with mike holt. cathy was in town cuz she was headed for mexico the next day so we got to kick it with her too. i finally put my new driver's license to good use by buying my first beer at the grocery store.

to see the pics click on the thumbnail.

Cool Job

Monday, March 17, 2003

so i was walking back to the dorms after finishing my Marketing final and i see a golf cart drop off this one chick. i'm thinkin' to myself, "damn, what a lazy bitch..." then i notice the driver of the golf cart was my teammate from bball!! he offered me a ride back to my dorm on the golf cart. his real job is supposed to be Driving for Disabled Students Services...but he was tellin' me how he just drives around for an hour, picking up and dropping off his buddies.

what a chill job!!!

he told me he gets paid $10.50 an hour too!! when i got back to my room, i researched it a little more and found that volunteers must do at least 20 hours per quarter (10 weeks), which isn't that bad at all. just 2 hours a week of driving around taxiing people to their classes. oh yeah, volunteers also get priority registration!!! how fuckin' cool is that!!

i could totally imagine myself passing up some poor guy on crutches just so i can trail behind some hottie walking to class. haha